Round round round around Round round round Round round round around Circling the red splashed ground What do I do? Just do that! No. Round round round around Circling the red tinted land What do I do? Just do that! No. Round round around Circling circling What do I do? Just do that! No. Why even ask? Because I don't want do go around Just do that! No. Round round round around.
Never in my life have I felt as much a failure as now. Perhaps I have simply never seen it. But while before I have always wondered how I will survive until the next milestone, now I wonder if I want to. 20 more years. 20. I am forty now. it will take 20 more years. But while 20 means I'm more than half way there in terms of time, it is also true that I've only been truly responsible for myself for 15 years. I'll have to double this and then some. Can I do it? Will I do it? Perhaps if I take one day at a time. I don't understand how scripture applies. Jesus came and died for our sins, so that we may live and have life abundantly. What does that look like? How does that work? I have been 20 years a Christian now; have I missed the boat? Do I not truly believe, that I do not see this abundance? When I look around, I come only to one conclusion. I have not been faithful enough. I have not sacrificed enough or loved enough. I have not served enough. What a lousy bind, beca...
Shall we do the unnatural? Of course we shall. We are called to be unnatural, although not in the perverse sense. We are called to be unnatural. Unnaturally good, unnaturally kind, unnaturally selfless. For what reward is there for the one who does all things according to what they wish and how they feel? Doesn't everyone do the same? To the extent that we deny ourselves - not for the sake of future indulgence or for the sake of some worldly gain like respect or wealth or public standing, but for the sake of being like Christ - to that extent we have given our life for Christ and the Gospel and to that extent and far beyond, does God see and reward. Do not disqualify your reward by grumbling against your sacrifice. "Why must I do this?" "What is this torture?" "This is rubbish!". Those are the words of a slave. The same work is done, but in the spirit of unwillingness. There is no reward. For that work, there are only wages. And wages are given accord...
Comments
Post a Comment